(Because Isn't Everything Really About Her?)
Precious is ticked off at Mariah Carey for having more seniority than she does.
Madonna is ticked off at Mariah Carey for having more number one singles than she does.
Precious steals food.
Madonna steals children.
Precious slaps her classmate for calling her fat.
Madonna slaps her dancers just for the hell of it.
Precious is surrounded by people who make her life miserable.
Madonna makes life miserable for those who surround her.
Precious is overweight.
Madonna is overrated.
After a tragedy, Precious slips by a church to watch a church choir.
After a tragedy, Madonna watches a church choir, wearing only a slip.
Lesbians are drawn to Precious.
Lesbians are betrayed by Madonna.
Precious is illiterate.
Madonna dates illiterates.
Precious never had a good role model.
Madonna never had a good role.
Precious collects her innermost thoughts, then writes them down in a journal each day.
Madonna collects her money, then writes off each day without thinking about it.
Precious puts her faith in God.
Madonna puts her mouth on Jesus.
Precious has fantasies of being more important and more talented and more beautiful than she really is.
You're in the book.